You’re Not Alone
Grief is often really lonely. Sometimes excruciatingly so. Even if you have close friends and family connections over a shared loss, everyone grieves differently. We each speak a language uniquely our own when we mourn. Plus, one person is often more ready or able to do the hard and holy work of addressing sadness than those around them. If that’s you, know you aren’t alone in your loneliness.
“As you proceed, remember that lament is heavy lifting. It is restful in one very real sense because it means we’re not denying or distancing from what’s really happening. But at the same time, it can be hard and even scary work at times. With its complexity and unknowns, it might feel like grief will overwhelm you because it’s so big at times.
That means engaging lament will sometimes require a surprising measure of energy...It will mean cultivating resilience to engage complicated and painful emotions. As you stay with me in reclaiming (or going deeper into) the difficult yet indispensable act of practicing lament, trust it will be worth it…
“And know this—lament is surprisingly hopeful. As strange as that may sound now, I promise it’s true. It’s an act of trust both that we can face pain and survive, and that God cares about our anger, confusion, doubt, grief, and fear. And when we’re not stuck suppressing or spiraling in grief, we’re freed up to act for goodness and freedom and justice.” (from the introduction of Hopeful Lament).
Know that I am cheering you on in this hard and sacred work. Also, please don’t hesitate to reach out if you need support. If I am available, I’d love to speak with you directly and if not, I can share resources and contacts that might be helpful. Through it all, please be gentle with yourself, knowing that you can ask for help from friends and, if needed, from a good therapist, spiritual director, or pastoral counselor.
You are invited into our:
Apothecary for Lament: tools, practices, and resources for grieving well without giving into despair
This might be something you visit with a cozy cup of tea. Other times, you might invite a conversation with a trusted friend or family member. There isn’t a “right” way to engage with the book or the tools and resources. Experiment with the ones that resonate and find the rhythms that work for you.